Depth requires discernment

Shadow work requires structure, training, and respect for the psyche.

You’ve probably heard the terms: “shadow”, “shadow work”, or maybe even “shadow self”. Before we go down this path, let’s discuss why these terms matter and the importance of tracing the concept of the shadow self back to its roots.

Not all shadow work or shadow practices are the same, and it can be incredibly dangerous to follow the guidance of those who claim to be shadow workers when they may not have any in-depth training or understanding of the function and anatomy of the psyche.

Influence, historical context, and education inform our perspectives on shadow; this is everything and essential to how we all operate. These factors function in the background and will dictate the type of experience you may have under their guidance.

This is not to say I’m the only expert or my way is the only way to approach working with the shadow; this is about encouraging you to use discernment.

I felt an urgent calling to emphasize the necessity of trusting our instincts when screening shadow work practitioners. I’ve heard, witnessed, and have been on the receiving end of some horror stories.

For this reason, I intend to present this article with integrity in an industry that I acknowledge can be extremely predatory, filled with some who exploit vulnerabilities.

Not all people in the new age, spirituality, and personal development spaces are doing the work required to hold space for you… And you deserve better.

For the sake of not having to repeat them again, I will refer to the new age, spirituality, and personal development spaces as the modern wellness culture.

I work with people who work with people who challenge thier perspectives; it’s that simple.

I have a Jungian analyst, certified by the International Association for Analytical Psychology (IAAP), which makes me an analysand (a term for one who is the client/patient of a professional analyst).

I receive this type of therapy weekly and have for about three years with my current analyst. In addition, I have had several mentors from different backgrounds and cultural influences for the past twenty-three years.

My studies in shadow began at the age of ten years old when a local girl went missing. She worked at the same bank as a family friend. She was last seen at a bar, the same bar where one of my friends lived. Her absence haunted me and opened up new spaces within my psyche.

When they found her body, I obsessively began reading newspaper articles and could not stop talking about the case. It was a little unsettling for my mother, yet there was something in her that recognized something was blossoming within me. I went on to pursue intuitive development, forensic science, and enrolled in criminology and psychology classes when I started college at 18.

A few years later, I became more deeply attuned to the path of a shadow worker after years of feeling victimized by unethical people who use terms such as “intuitive guide”, "healer", “shadow worker”, “yoga therapist”, “spiritual counselor”, etc.

It’s disheartening and shocking how many who proclaim to be healers/guides/coaches in modern wellness culture refuse to look in the mirror and do the deep work it takes to hold this type of space for others.

Shadow work is too frequently treated like a trendy, convenient weekend process, where you can figure out your life in a weekend.

Shadow work is also used as a relentless process of chasing catharsis (deep emotional release).

Shadow work, especially through a Jungian perspective, is none of those things.

Catharsis is the emotional release we feel as suppressed feelings are expressed and felt, allowing the psyche to discharge tension, process an experience, and bring us back into psychological balance.

Inexperienced practitioners have no clue how the shadow relates to the ego, the persona, and the soul, or why that even matters.

For this reason, terrible ideas and unfounded concepts are perpetuated, contributing to abhorrent practices, egoic philosophies, and unsafe experiences for unsuspecting participants.

Inexperienced practitioners have not trained themselves, their instincts, or egos to detect the subtle shifts and cues one has when working with shadow material. They project thier unconscious beliefs and attitudes and call it guidance.

Inexperienced practitioners present mythic material as literal forms, leading you to think you must connect with some divine force outside of yourself or enter into a past life to heal something that originated here, in this body, in this lifetime… yet they do have access to that level of depth; therefore, they use an external construct to give credence to their ‘vision’. Do not misinterpret this to mean I do not believe in past lives; I do, but that is not the essence of what most untrained people are actually tapping into.

Inexperienced practitioners will not be trained to detect transference and countertransference. These are relational dynamics that emerge when we are in a shared psychic field with someone. Transference occurs when a person unconsciously projects feelings, expectations, or patterns from earlier relationships onto another, such as a therapist, coach, or authority figure. They are directly related to unresolved emotional themes from the past (in this lifetime). Countertransference is the response that arises in the therapist/coach/practitioner, including emotional reactions, assumptions, or personal material activated by the client’s projections. When understood, these dynamics can offer valuable insight into relational patterns and unconscious processes.

Inexperienced practitioners get a boost to the ego when a client has a cathartic experience; therefore, they may unconsciously curate services that force this process upon a client. It keeps them trapped in a cycle of needing to fix, needing to heal, and the clients fail to experience their innate wholeness.

They become a project, something to work on.

Inexperienced practitioners do not have any concept of how powerful myth, folklore, and story are regarding the psyche and creating experiences that allow the psyche to self-regulate.

Inexperienced practitioners have no clue what complexes are, how they manifest, why we have them, or how to dissolve them, even though they are the energetic structures responsible for many of our problematic patterns.

Inexperienced practitioners could not tell you the benefit or value of the ego, because many coaches/healers in the new age, spirituality, and personal development spaces think it is the problem, something to transcend.

Inexperienced practitioners do not know what the process of individuation is, even though it is deeply related to the shadow and psyche as a whole.

The psyche self-regulates by compensating for imbalance through nightmares and dreams, emotions, symptoms, and symbols, guiding consciousness toward greater harmony, integration, and psychological wholeness over time.

The ego plays a massive role in the process of individuation (the unfolding of the psyche). It organizes our conscious identity, allowing us to navigate relationships, choices, and responsibilities in the world.

An inexperienced practitioner will criticize the ego, harping only on its defensiveness and rigidity, leaving out the more important quality, which is that the ego is the center of awareness that makes reflection possible. Without the ego, encounters with the shadow would overwhelm or potentially destabilize the psyche.

A healthy ego provides the psychological structure needed to meet the shadow, tolerate inner conflict, and gradually integrate previously disowned aspects of the self. The ego becomes an essential factor in moving toward wholeness.

The shadow is the vast underworld of the psyche; it is not a dumping ground for “bad traits.” It is an intelligent system. The shadow is not something to purge aggressively, expose recklessly, or dive into for dramatic release. These ideas are what make shadow dangerous in modern wellness culture.

True shadow work is not about emotional catharsis. It is about understanding the anatomy of the psyche, how the nervous system responds, how survival strategies form, and how to creatively work with unconscious material as it emerges.

In addition to all of this, it is also about integrating parts of the personality that are beneath conscious awareness, the aspects of your being you want to call forward and have become second nature.

In depth psychology, the shadow forms in relationship to the ego and the persona. The ego organizes conscious identity, while the persona is the social mask we develop to adapt to expectations. Qualities that do not fit this identity are often pushed out of awareness and become part of the shadow.

The shadow therefore, contains rejected traits, emotions, and potentials. When acknowledged, it expands the ego’s awareness and reduces projection.

In many traditions, this process also reconnects a person with the soul, the deeper, symbolic center of meaning. Integrating shadow material allows the psyche to move toward greater wholeness, authenticity, and psychological balance.

Without this understanding, individuals may become destabilized, dissociate, or deepen their fragmentation rather than moving toward psychological regulation.

When approached without containment, shadow material can flood rather than integrate.

When approached with reverence, structure, and depth, something magical happens.

My client Simone gave me permission to share her story.

Simone came to me with constant anxiety and patterns of self-sabotage. No matter how successful she became, she would do something to unravel it. Relationships fell apart, and opportunities would collapse when she began to feel excited about them.

She said, “I feel like I ruin everything.”

Rather than trying to fix her behavior, we entered the psyche through story, one of the oldest pathways of shadow integration. We worked with the fairy tale of Rumpelstiltskin.

Before I share this experience, please note these tales do not equate to a singular pattern, each one, like a dream, has countless potentials.

On the surface, Rumpelstiltskin can seem like a lame story about spinning straw into gold. But there are hidden patterns in these stories that Jungians are trained to look for. Within this storyline, we discovered Simone’s problematic patterns of shame and survival.

The young girl in the tale is trapped in impossible labor, driven by secrecy and fear, bargaining away pieces of herself to survive pressure she never chose in the first place.

As we explored the tale somatically and symbolically, Simone felt a tightness in her chest, the same place her anxiety seemed to manifest.

We reflected further on the tale; I asked Simone what other parts of herself in the storyline she could relate to. She said, “I learned early that I had to perform to be loved.”

Her self-sabotage was not here to destroy her life; it was attempting to show her where she had unconsciously created survival strategies that were no longer helpful or productive.

Success felt dangerous to Simone because it meant visibility. Intimacy felt dangerous because it meant vulnerability.

Simone’s nervous system was trying to keep her safe by interfering with and collapsing anything that felt too exposing.

Once that coping mechanism and strategy was named (not judged), her body softened, tears surfaced, and her breath deepened.

Over the following weeks, her anxiety eased. She noticed small yet significant differences in her relationships.

We did not force a change, we did not rewire her subconscious, we did not shoot for a cathartic release, and we didn’t blame her past, but because we created space, what had been hidden no longer needed to run her life.

This is an example of the magic of shadow work.

No emotional theatrics, no breakdowns, no grand gestures… just the simple recognition of an unconscious pattern and WHY it was valuable and how to shift it now that it was no longer needed.

Fairy tales touch upon the shadow in ways the ego cannot.

This is another reason why I wrote Apothecary for the Afflicted: Shadow Work for Invisible Wounds, to offer shadow work through myth, story, and depth psychology rather than surface-level emotional release.

When people work with me and begin to understand what the shadow actually is… fear dissolves, and the psyche feels enchanted once again.

When they understand how to work with the shadow safely, transformation becomes gentle, sometimes even exciting, rather than cathartic and chaotic.

Shadow work is not about becoming acquainted with negativity. It is about becoming whole.

It is about reclaiming the trapped energy, freeing the instincts, and deepening the intuitive knowing you already have in your bones.

The danger is not the shadow. The danger is working with it without skill, containment, and respect for the psyche’s intelligence.

When held properly, the shadow becomes a psychic cauldron of alchemy, transforming both pain and potentiality into wisdom.

If this resonates, a few other tools may support you in working with shadow:

· My Book: Apothecary for the Afflicted Shadow Work for Invisible Wounds

· The Shadow Work Experience: Death Becomes Her

· The Quiz: Which Dark Fairy Tale Will Help You Understand Your Shadow?